• A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
  • Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.
  • It is better to deserve honours and not have them than to have them and not deserve them.
  • Man was made at the end of the week’s work when God was tired.
  • When angry, count to four;  when very angry, swear.
  • When red-haired people are above a certain grade, their hair is auburn.

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